Musings 2

This is a linked matter of my FB post I did last month. I think this should be somewhere in my blog itself, as these are my musings :)

The love story of Sun and Earth, the ones who can never be together and far apart, but still keeping their promises everyday. 

Sun : My love, Earth, I want to see you happy always. 

Earth : I would be happy, if you keep the promise of love.

Quoting how Sun keeps his promise everyday again:

"Kissing his love, with his first rays. She being joyful to see the love of her life keeping his promise everyday, from miles and miles apart, shining for her. Only her! "

Their conversation is so lovely, romantic and the depth of their love evident. 

Sun : How different we are; I am just a matter of fierceness and you so tender and enormously beautiful with all your wealthy nature. We are seeing each other from this far, and there is no hope of we being together. And you still love me?

Earth : You are a matter of fierceness for others, but for me you are the reason I am alive. You are the nurturing factor of my wealthy nature, my beauty. You are the handsomest one for me. Yes I do love you, without any expectations, claiming no rights on you! But you would be my love forever, and my endless wait for you continues...

The Plantar Fasciitis which slowed me down.

This post was in my drafts for long. Something was holding back me from posting this. 
Its my personal experience, and hopefully a good read for you.

2017 has all started with new hopes, aspirations and lots of energy. I could see the vibe in me taking me through lot of things, and I was into multiple things. My friends used to tell me, what all you are doing. You have an ongoing enthusiasm somewhere hidden girl. I was also enjoying it, all the hard work and the success coming out of it. My work, my relationship building, my ability to make people around me happy, my baking skills all was coming under fruition than I thought.

While enjoying the success of all my hard work, life hit my back so strong with a heel pain. Initial days it was thought of as a normal pain due to workouts, that may go in sometime. I ignored and was into my workouts and running regime as usual. But things were getting worse. I could feel I am getting disabled because of it. I am not able to walk or run as before. Gone through lot of medications and analysis, and everyone has the same answer. This is Plantar Fasciitis, usually a runners problem and when you have a flat foot! They don't have any medicines to cure, but they said time can only heal it, and how long? They don't have an answer.. And the worst part of it was yet to come, they asked me to refrain from my workouts, the sole thing which was adding to my energy, my enthusiasm. Literally I refrained from everything because of that, everything that I was enjoying.

It hit me like a tornado, I lost my confidence in life. I felt like its the end of my life. There is nothing I can do further. The person who always have something to do, called a hyper, has laid herself inside the four walls. I remember those days now, and its still scary. I can't even imagine I have gone through it. All I could just do was to cry, thinking about my situation. The strong lady who stood like a rock in many upsetting situations, is shattered. Yes, I am stuck, I wont be able to do things as I was doing before. But my mind was not ready to accept to live like that. The frustration became depression. 

People says, when you go through hard times, then is when you will understand the people around. I could understand who cared about me more. My family and friends, but especially my husband and kid, they were more concerned than anyone else. They gave me the strength again to live, and the motivation to dream more. The depressing days started to diminish. Even with PF still there, I could take hold of my mind back. I have started to adjust with the situation, rather as I always say embrace the situation and move on. All these because of backing they gave. Now my physical illness is still in recovering process, and yes I know I am not able to do things as before. But they made me understand, its fine to slow down sometimes. This is not the end of world or end of your life. You have a life which welcomes you with lot of hopes and aspirations. You should get up and be the old enthusiastic one. 

I decided, at least for the sake of my family and friends, I need to get up. Get up from the mental trauma, which was pulling me back. Everyone would need to go through such slow downs in their life, but those things should not stop you in your life. "It is fine to slow down and then get up to pace, but it is not advised to stop!"

So now, my mind is prepared to accept the situation, and I am giving it the time for mother nature to cure. Hopefully very soon I would be able to be the old Swathy, in my physical activities too!

Musings 1

I would have lot of this type, so numbering it as first 😋


Years and years passed, she the wave wanted to meet her beloved beach. She never let her hope to drown, that she can make him hers. She was outrageous sometimes, coz no one was able to understand her emotions. Even her beloved beach. He told her, I can't be yours. She fell , shattered, was calm for a moment and people started thinking she is no more. Then the time came, when she bursted out with all her rage to conquer her own beach. Wandering like a wild animal through the streets and almost spoiling everything she saw.   People called it with a pet name Tsunami. But who knew the real pain. And what she did after that, she couldn't see her beach in pain, and left the land, back to her home, saying a whisper to her beloved. Man! I love you. But cannot see you hurt. She still dances with the winds, and dreams about her meaningless wish of being his bride.

Now you know my philosophy has reached a dangerously critical stage, and should be soon taken to mental hospital 😝

The Multifaceted, SORRY!!

I was lying on my couch sipping the coffee little by little, drenched in my thoughts.

I was running like a wild zombie to catch up every bit of my life and that's one way I enjoy the old moments which would never be back and of course it has an implied side effect that it reminds moments of pain, ha obviously tears would roll out, and it happens to the pure hearts' alone.

I was wondering how many times this word is used in my life, probably can be ranked NO #1 in usage. "Sorry", ever thought about the fact that it has multiple faces to show to different people and to different situations. The topic seemed interesting to my "always find me new things" mind and thought to stop the zombie run and have a focused run behind this "Sorry".

So whenever I research on things, whatever be the topic, I would like to take each persons seat and understand the situation from their perspective. This is something which I got inborn I think, not a forced one. I guess, it is because I am a very true Libra, who has to come up with a justified answer every time, and of course then everyone involved should be considered. So like any other topic, here too I imagined myself in different roles, situations; the "Requester" and the "Acknowledger" in all possible situations I could think about.


So I am now in the seat of the requester, the moments I have asked  Sorry to someone. I could feel how relieved I felt after asking sorry to someone I hurt. It can be from a simple dropping her book down to extreme extend of breaking a heart; and I could see how each Sorry is different, and we use the same word thinking it can heal all the mishaps whether it is a simple one or extremely harmful thing. But fortunately, for me I haven't ever touched that extreme line. So if someone thinks that I have been to extremes, please be open about it, coz its out of my knowledge and I haven't asked a Sorry for that yet. I really owe Sorry for those people, and wish to do that at least. So as I said, for a person who asks for sorry, even though the intensity of situations are different, everyone was relieved of the suffocation in their hearts after they asked for one. More or less, its just an escapade, where people think asking a sorry would help them escape from all the troubles they created, and they smart people are back to their world.

But ever thought about the person who is in the other side acknowledging your Sorry? Ha, so for the justified outcome, I need to switch the seat to the Acknowledgee, now. It has also the same simple to extreme versions according to the situation. Yes, it does carry a relative degree in the amount of pain caused, but this is the person who carries the pain of the Sorry after that situation, and some ones, even lasting his entire life. The person asking Sorry would never ever think about this, how the same word would reflect on the other person. When he is relieved from his suffocation, the other one is put into pain and he piggybacks this his entire life.

So "sorry" is an art just like Leonardo Davinci's Monolisa. The undefined, the unpredictable, dual faced, yet sometimes unforgettable moments in someone's life.

Here I am taking an extreme example to see the relativity better, from two person's perspective;

Person A : Hey, Its unfortunate I know. But, Sorry to break your heart. I never meant it!
Person B : Stares at A for a moment. Is that I heard right? He is asking a Sorry? Oh yeah, he wants to be relieved from the troubles he has caused in a single word. Ahh! It hurts isn't it.
With a made up smile, B says, Ohh, its fine. I am ok!

This is a decent way B behaves, and don't think every time you are a Person A, who would get such a perfect answer your hoped for. Sometimes, it can be even worse, pouring the hot soup over A's face, which leaves A staring back at B.

But ultimately, what happened, either case A is not affected, or A is affected somewhat with small temporary burns he can survive with. And see what happened to B; He is living with the heavy heart knowing the fact that whatever hoped for was just a dream and with lot of questions around "what" and "why". B would have the permanent mark of the wound, as it is on his heart. Seems cell regeneration over there is somewhat very slow or nil. Each wound would leave a mark over there, with a pointer to the memory system, our brain, and each time that memory location is fetched, this mark will be refreshed, giving some pain of the wound again. I know, I have gone a little computer organization way here. Excuse me! But the idea behind would be very much clear to any one out there, I guess!


So whenever you are in such situations, especially asking for a sorry, please think about the impression it would have in the other person's mind. Don't give false hope to anyone and mess them up. Because for you Sorry is a beautiful faced escape mechanism, and for the counter person, its an ugly faced devil, hanging on his memories for ever. Because, you would  never know when she will show her ugly face on you! And next time you promise something to someone, make sure you don't have to ask sorry for that ever, coz it won't be always mellifluous to listen, like Justin Beiber's baby I am sorry song, for the person who has to acknowledge it!